(via pmon3y69)

turkey-imported-from-maine:

firelorcl:

meladoodle:

i wanna be a reverse tooth fairy where i rob people and then scatter human teeth on their bed

a dentist

i dont know what your dentist is doing to you but i think you need to go to the police

Omg I can’t stop laughing!!

(via truth-be-told-i-never-was-yours)

Earlier today, somebody asked me the craziest thing that Beyonce said and kept asking me like, “What was something crazy that she said?” So, I started saying that she’s actually an alien.

(via truth-be-told-i-never-was-yours)

hoodethicist:

Shit is fucking sickening

hoodethicist:

Shit is fucking sickening

(via truth-be-told-i-never-was-yours)

thatsnotverywerewolfy:

acruelultimatum:

think of all the sex you could be having with this couch
and by sex i mean lying down alone on it while you watch episodes of your favorite tv shows on netflix 

thatsnotverywerewolfy:

acruelultimatum:

think of all the sex you could be having with this couch

and by sex i mean lying down alone on it while you watch episodes of your favorite tv shows on netflix 

(via truth-be-told-i-never-was-yours)

popculturebrain:

New Trailer: ‘Orange Is the New Black' Season 2 - June 6

(via truth-be-told-i-never-was-yours)

countsassmaster:

sorchaception:

"And just what the hell am I supposed to do with these?"

"I requested minions of darkness, and you gave me fluffy jellybeans."

countsassmaster:

sorchaception:

"And just what the hell am I supposed to do with these?"

"I requested minions of darkness, and you gave me fluffy jellybeans."

(via truth-be-told-i-never-was-yours)